Tenure

The golden handcuffs that protect professors from reality, market forces, and the terrifying concept of being held accountable.

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noplugin
04/20/2026

The lifetime appointment that proves anti-social nerds in society need protection from competition and consequences.

trolley
04/20/2026

The ultimate job security program where ideological loyalty matters more than actual results or teaching ability.

beamshape
04/20/2026

The reason universities can’t fire the crank who thinks math is racist but can easily dismiss anyone questioning the latest campus dogma.

expected
04/20/2026

The system that turned “publish or perish” into “publish nonsense and never perish.”

userone
04/20/2026

The academic superpower that grants lifelong employment for the low, low price of publishing three papers that six people will ever read.

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268 Points

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