computer – Salty Dictionary

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9.3k Views10 Comments240 Votes

ChatGPT

An AI machine programmed to pretend to understand human language and emotions, but really just churns out generic responses without any real understanding.

240 Points
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18k Views7 Comments169 Votes

Cell phone

a portable communication device for use in a cellular system for the following reasons: 48.5% social media, 21.7% texting, 6.2% awkward situation avoider, 3.2% flashlight, and 0.1% actually calling people

169 Points
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24.6k Views6 Comments248 Votes

Chrome

The surveillance tool disguised as a web browser that tracks your every move while pretending it’s just “making the web faster.”

248 Points
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22k Views5 Comments223 Votes

Tim Cook Stepping Down As Apple CEO

The leadership change that proves even turning a phone into a status symbol eventually hits diminishing returns.

223 Points
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28.8k Views5 Comments284 Votes

MacBook Neo

The ultra-thin machine that sacrifices functionality for aesthetics and then charges you extra for the adapters you now need.

284 Points
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9.1k Views4 Comments145 Votes

A clean house

The sign of a broken WIFI

145 Points
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13.5k Views3 Comments225 Votes

Flight Simulator

The safest way to experience Boeing’s innovations from the comfort of your own home

225 Points
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16.7k Views3 Comments258 Votes

Excel Spreadsheet

The perfect companion for boring academics, turning their passion for numbers and data into endless rows and columns of monotony.

258 Points
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12.2k Views3 Comments121 Votes

Apple Vision Pro

An overpriced immersive gadget for visualizing the “community standards”

121 Points
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13.5k Views3 Comments133 Votes

Linux

The free software that costs you nothing except your time, sanity, and the will to live.

133 Points
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5.7k Views2 Comments151 Votes

Laptop

A portable device which is rarely used on laps.

151 Points
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12.4k Views2 Comments257 Votes

Dell

A technology company that specializes in creating bland and unremarkable computers.

257 Points
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