Salty Dictionary – Express Yourself

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Abridged Collection of Interdisciplinary Laws

Collection of sarcastic proverbs. The collection started in 1974, when Conrad Schneiker first typed in Murphy’s Laws to explore the workings of a new computer at the University of Arizona Computing Center. He added a couple of pages of other […]

385 Points
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31.5k Views25 Comments

Black Privilege

The magical ability to break every law in the book and still be considered the eternal victim.

676 Points
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48.1k Views61 Comments

Rules of Thumb

A collection of observations by people who bother to look at how things work and at how they get things done.

486 Points
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29.8k Views61 Comments

Joe Biden

Fraudulently Installed 46th President of the United States

535 Points
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32.1k Views61 Comments

COVID Vaccine

Experimental medical substance for the artificially created virus where the populace is being used for the human trials.

649 Points
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25.8k Views26 Comments

US Presidential Elections 2020

The 59th quadrennial ‘democratic’ process in which people’s choices were ignored and votes were counted until Democrats won.

412 Points
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29.1k Views8 Comments

Happiness Index

The progressive indicator that automatically goes down the moment Trump gets elected.

293 Points
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24.1k Views24 Comments

Nancy Pelosi

One of the biggest frauds in the history of American Politics

293 Points
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24.8k Views24 Comments

Nancy Pelosi's Insider Trades

The insider trading act of Pelosi’s husband buying Roblox stock the day it went public, and acquiring Microsoft stock through options.

302 Points
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28.8k Views7 Comments

Peer Review

The sacred academic ritual where a handful of like-minded activists quietly approve each other’s work while ensuring dissenting ideas never see the light of day.

284 Points
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27.1k Views7 Comments

Have-nots

Professional victims who turned “I don’t have it” into a full-time occupation and political identity.

241 Points
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28.8k Views7 Comments

Urgent Care

The modern medical pit stop where minor injuries go to become slightly more expensive minor injuries.

271 Points
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27k Views48 Comments

Democrat Party

The party of Treason, Corruption, and Incompetence

779 Points
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35.4k Views10 Comments

Unhoused

The linguistic upgrade that turns a serious social problem into a temporary lifestyle choice that apparently requires no personal responsibility.

352 Points
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24k Views8 Comments

Triggering

The emotional boogeyman that turns every uncomfortable truth into a personal attack requiring institutional protection.

248 Points
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23.5k Views8 Comments

Spencer Pratt

The former reality TV villain from The Hills who is now running for LA mayor on a platform of actually enforcing laws, which is terrifying Democrats who thought “Summer of Love” chaos was a permanent lifestyle.

237 Points
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32.1k Views8 Comments

ER

The place where medical students, residents, and other diversity quota recipients learn medicine by practicing on real patients, often misdiagnosing, mistreating, and making sick people sicker… or dead.

308 Points
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26.8k Views7 Comments

Ideological Contagion

The self-replicating belief system that convinces people to work against their own interests while feeling morally superior for doing so.

265 Points
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24k Views51 Comments

Coronavirus Outbreak

Made in China virus, which has infected hundreds since the outbreak began in Wuhan, China, in December.

360 Points
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30k Views7 Comments

Democratic Socialism

The Trojan horse that replaces individual liberty with collective misery, one popular vote at a time.

301 Points
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27.7k Views7 Comments

Ideological Conformity

The progressive requirement that everyone must think exactly alike while pretending they celebrate diversity.

276 Points
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26.1k Views28 Comments

Six-Word Story

An entire story told in six words. It is a short narrative that can have all of the emotional themes of longer stories.

363 Points
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24.3k Views5 Comments

Alligator Alcatraz

The Florida-themed upgrade to America’s super-max prison where escape attempts would be solved by nature’s own hungry security system.

235 Points
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31.1k Views9 Comments

Silent Majority

The quiet, productive backbone of society that pays the taxes, follows the rules, and gets called every name in the book for not joining the latest moral panic.

311 Points
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33.2k Views8 Comments

New York City-Run Store

The place where you need three forms of ID, a vaccine card, and a diversity statement just to buy a loaf of bread.

318 Points
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24.6k Views5 Comments

L3Harris

The defense contractor that makes billions helping America fight endless wars while quietly hoping those wars never actually end.

248 Points
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27.8k Views8 Comments

Systems of Oppression

The modern mythology that turns success into unearned privilege and failure into systemic victimhood

259 Points
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26.8k Views7 Comments

Millions Of Student Borrowers Are Defaulting

The quiet revenge of reality against the “everyone deserves a college degree” cult that ignored basic supply-and-demand for worthless majors.

260 Points
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24.4k Views10 Comments

May Day

International Workers Day to celebrate the atrocities of Communism.

269 Points
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25.4k Views6 Comments

OPECxit

The geopolitical divorce where oil producers stop pretending to care about net-zero deadlines and start prioritizing actual energy demand.

250 Points
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29k Views7 Comments

Demsplaining

The obnoxious progressive habit of explaining to you, in the slowest and most condescending tone possible, why their terrible ideas are actually brilliant and your lived experience is wrong.

292 Points
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29.9k Views9 Comments

Woke Virus

The highly contagious ideological pathogen that turns functional institutions into dysfunctional therapy sessions obsessed with race, gender, and feelings.

291 Points
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28.9k Views6 Comments

Marginalized

The sacred progressive status symbol that turns statistical underperformance into automatic moral authority and unlimited claims on resources.

287 Points
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27.8k Views6 Comments

Woke Odyssey

The multimillion-dollar Hollywood production that turned Homer’s ancient Greek epic into a modern DEI checklist, proving even Christopher Nolan couldn’t resist the urge to race-swap and gender-swap Western classics.

281 Points
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26.8k Views6 Comments

Bigly

The linguistic troll that let Trump promise massive results and then deliver them, while journalists wrote serious columns asking if it was a real word.

264 Points
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25.4k Views7 Comments

Project Stargate

The U.S. government’s extremely serious $20 million psychic espionage program that spent two decades trying to weaponize remote viewing, astral projection, and spoon-bending before quietly admitting it was mostly expensive witchcraft.

251 Points
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27.9k Views6 Comments

Coexist

The bumper sticker theology that lets people pretend incompatible civilizations can share the same space without conflict, history, or basic math.

279 Points
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31.2k Views9 Comments

Thought Crime

The progressive masterpiece where merely thinking the wrong thought is now treated as a serious moral offense requiring public confession and punishment.

311 Points
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28.8k Views9 Comments

Parental Rights

The radical notion that moms and dads should have primary authority over their own children instead of teachers, counselors, and government bureaucrats.

271 Points
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20.3k Views3 Comments

Gazprom

The energy supplier the EU pretends to have divorced while still sneaking in for weekend visits through third-party terminals.

252 Points
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29.9k Views6 Comments

Systemic

The rhetorical Swiss Army knife used to blame everything from test scores to crime rates on structures instead of individuals.

281 Points
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27.1k Views24 Comments

FBI

The Federal Bodyguard Unit of the Ruling Elite.

374 Points
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25.7k Views4 Comments

Cole Allen

The 31-year-old teacher from Torrance, California, who became the collective left’s newest unspoken hero after attempting to assassinate President Trump at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

245 Points
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29k Views5 Comments

White House Correspondents’ Dinner Shooting

The assassination attempt that perfectly illustrates how years of Democrat-fueled hatred, California-style radicalism, and Davos globalist rhetoric have normalized violence against political opponents.

294 Points
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28.8k Views9 Comments

Colorectal Cancer Rising in Youth

The statistical anomaly that appeared after the most aggressive vaccine mandate campaign in modern history and is now blamed on everything except the obvious.

281 Points
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23.2k Views3 Comments

JetBlue Using Customers' Personal Data To Hike Air Fares

The modern airline innovation that makes flying more expensive by knowing exactly how much you’re willing to pay.

224 Points
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28.9k Views5 Comments

Europe's Illusion Of Geopolitical Power

The comforting fantasy that Europe still matters on the world stage while quietly depending on American military muscle, energy, and protection.

286 Points
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27.8k Views6 Comments

Senate Banking Committee

The elite congressional club where senators pretend to regulate Wall Street while quietly getting rich off the same banks they’re supposed to oversee.

267 Points
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24.3k Views5 Comments

Indeed

The modern unemployment simulator where companies post fake listings just to collect resumes for their database.

243 Points
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21k Views5 Comments

AI Job Scams

The dystopian upgrade to traditional fraud where AI writes the fake job posting, conducts the fake interview, and then asks for your bank details to “process your offer.”

213 Points
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